The 7:30 Bus

It’s a great day to talk about love again. In the last post Let’s talk Love I shared a story where love grew to such lengths that it became the end of it all. Today I have a story to show you the other side, the innocence and purity of love.

Mishti had bagged a new job and was so excited about it, although this was the first time she will be travelling by the bus but it was all fine. The first few days she had no idea that every bus had a fixed time to depart and arrive. She had mostly taken the subway for college.

One day she boarded the bus that departed at 7:30, she was new to the whole bus journey, she even got into a fight with the guy sitting opposite to her. Since she reached work on time, she decided to take the same bus daily.

She boarded the bus next day and saw the guy she had fought with sitting with his friends, talking and laughing. He was a fine looking man and she saw him give away his seat to an old lady. This man was addressed as D by his friends.

One day, Mishti stood at the bus station waiting for the bus but there was none of the regular faces around, she checked the time and she wasn’t late either. D was also there, he saw her all confused and panicking. He walked up to her and told her that the bus left early today and that they can take the next bus.

Mishti was overjoyed to see a familiar face in all that crowd. She stood with him till the next bus came. He helped her on to the bus and even got her a seat while he had to stand during the entire one hour journey. When they got off, she wanted to thank him but he just smiled at her and left.

Things started to change between them, D’s friends started to tease him by playing songs for Mishti and him. She started to get what they were trying to do and realised that she liked him too.

They had never actually talked but the attraction was sweet. He looked at her every time she wasn’t looking and she did the same. She wanted to know so much more about him and she was scared when he had to stand at the door of the bus because of the crowd. He would look after her silently and she would thank him for being there.

No words were spoken between the two but the feelings were mutual. They used to walk in the same direction after getting off the bus but had always maintained a distance for the sake of each others’ comfort but finally one day they walked together. He tried to talk to her and she was happy to carry on the conversation.

The journey, had become more interesting now and Mishti who had never liked traveling on a bus looked forward to each morning on the 7:30 bus.

She never got to ask his full name and something terrible happened, she was required to leave her job, which meant she would no longer have the need to travel on the 7:30. It is still a mystery to me as to how it would have ended if she had not left that route.

Not all stories end up with the characters being together but I’m sure this is not the end.

Let’s talk Love

Love comes at us in various forms at different stages of our life. For a child it comes from her/his mother since s/he is in the womb and then the father and the other members of the family. Later as the child grows up and makes friends, s/he experiences love other than that of the family.

Teenage is usually when we are exposed to the form of love mostly talked about. Love that makes the story of every second Bollywood movie. With puberty waving it’s magic wand and the hormones dancing to the Cupid’s tune, we tend to get attracted to people. From here on, we understand love in our own way.

Here’s a story of love that knew no bounds and grew so big that it was love no more:

Amy met Sam on a social media platform, they fell in love pretty soon (just like any other love story nowadays). They were in a relationship and it was all hugs and kisses for about an year. During this time, they had made plans for their future together, they wanted to get married and start a family. To do this they needed some money. Amy, so deeply in love with Sam, left her studies and started working.

This is when things started to change. With Amy being busy with work, Sam became suspicious due to the lack of usual attention, he started asking more questions and would check her cellphone behind her back. One day, he visited her workplace, she was overjoyed to see him there but he wasn’t happy with what he saw.

He accused her of dressing fancy to impress the other men at her workplace and abused her. This scared Amy, she didn’t want to lose what she had with him so she started dressing plainly. Sam was still not happy, he kept accusing her of being an attention seeker and the abuses became stronger.

Amy was still not going to let go of the future they had planned together, she tried to make him understand but nothing changed. She left her job and started working with Sam hoping that he would be able to see her love as he saw it earlier.

It seemed, for a while, that everything was back to normal but then something happened. They were standing by a food cart when a drunk man walked behind Amy and started sniffing her hair. By the time she could understand what was happening, it was already too late. Sam shooed away the guy but then started blaming Amy for what had passed. When she tried to reason with him, he slapped her. She was stunned, unable to hold back her tears, she left.

Amy realised what she had done by not speaking up the first time, she decided to not take it anymore. She called Sam to tell him it was over. It didn’t go well with Sam, he abused her and threatened her to make public whatever pictures and videos they had taken together. He claimed that no one would ever love Amy as much as he did.

Scared and helpless, Amy shared this with her friends and family. As per their advice, she broke up with Sam over a text and blocked him from contacting her in any way.

Unable to reach Amy, Sam tried to share fake stories with Amy’s friends, he wanted her back at any cost. He started rumors about her cheating on him. Luckily, Amy got all the support she needed from her friends and family.

The relationship ended because of Amy’s unconditional dedication and Sam’s limitless love. Their fear of losing each other became the end of it all. Had Amy confronted Sam the first time he acted out, things would probably have ended differently. Had Sam talked to Amy about his insecurities, instead of secretly checking on her, they may have still stayed together.

This was a true depiction of blind love and the fear of loss that comes along with it. In conclusion, people may say that everything is fair in love but that’s not true, love should not be the means of it’s own end. The love you give may not be the same as the love you get but that doesn’t mean there’s no love left.

Well, after writing such serious stuff, I now feel extremely:

Who is to judge?

Judgement is inevitable, we all secretly judge others even when we don’t want to. Sometimes, we don’t even realize that we’re doing it, but this is not what this post is about. It’s a story of a 9-10 year old girl.

Let’s call her Pooja. So, Pooja was recently promoted to class V and was extremely excited about the new session. Like most co-ed schools, her school had this sitting plan. According to this plan, a girl and a boy have to sit together, so the teacher made her sit with a boy, let’s say his name was Rahul.

Now, Pooja was an introvert, always busy with herself. She never bothered Rahul. Rahul was a chubby little boy, he needed more space so he pushed her and shoved her to the wall.

She didn’t complain about this because she thought it was natural for a big guy to need more space, but things started to get worse. One day Rahul decided it was a good idea to put his hands on Pooja’s thigh and he did exactly that.

Poor Pooja had no idea what was going on although she knew something wasn’t quite right. She shoved his hand away. As a response Rahul pinched Pooja’s hand, so bad it started to bleed. Pooja didn’t want the teacher to see any of this because she thought she’ll be punished. She was a brilliant child and teacher’s loved her, she did not want them to think she did something wrong.

She kept quiet and the day passed, next day Rahul did the same this time he threatened Pooja that the teacher might find out that she was a bad girl. She was scared so she kept quiet again. She went back home, tried to talk to her mom about what was happening. Since she wasn’t able to explain it, she just said that she didn’t want to go to school.

Now the parents thought it was just another excuse, they didn’t realize that this girl never really made such excuses. In a few days, she finally mustered some courage and talked to the teacher, the teacher had the same idea as the parents. Since the little girl couldn’t explain what she was going through no one took her seriously.

She was troubled, couldn’t think of what she could do, so she fought, and when Rahul pinched her she went to the teacher and complained, this time she had a mark on her hand which was bleeding. The teacher switched her seats.

Although school never was the same for her ever again but she survived.

Listen to your children people, take them seriously. Don’t just be the judge for them, let them first be their own lawyers, let them present their case and then decide. Don’t pass a verdict based on what you feel they might be doing, you may never know the amount of stress your child is taking at a tender age.

(The names in the story are imaginary)

A short guide on how to work with women in a workplace.

I won’t say it’s easy but it’s not that difficult either.

Just came across a post from a friend, 1000 words on ‘Why he does not like working with women.‘

Women are not half as fussy as the men around us think. The generalisation and stereotyping about us is so easily accepted that even if we act differently, people find ways to describe us according to some pre-set code.

We DON’T want everything around us to be according to us, we know that the world does not revolve around us (well most of us do).

1. Uff it’s cold!!

I accept it that many of us do that but men do it too. A simple answer to this person would be, “hey! I understand that you’re cold but can you start carrying a shawl instead because there are about 50 other people who are happy with this temperature.” (That’s my version and I don’t recommend that anyone use it as it is ’cause it may not be as agreeable as they are when said by me.)

2. I can’t work for 10 hours, I signed up for 8.

Technically, she’s correct. However, if a compensation is involved, that becomes a choice. Some may choose to stay too.

For men it is easier to stay back as compared to women. Especially when it comes to night stretches, you may or may not know what kind of neighborhood she comes from and what restrictions are put on her. Even in 2019 there are people who do not support working women. There is more to it but it would take up a whole page if I get into it.

3. Language, dude, language!!!!!

For starters, you should not have issues with someone asking you to behave professionally in a workplace.

Do you abuse around the women in your family? Maybe some of you do, I can’t say. Abusing is not a praiseworthy task in any situation. You want a woman to be comfortable while you abuse someone else’s mother and sisters? Nice!!

You may not mean any of it, maybe it’s just your way of talking (not very attractive) but why is it difficult for you to hold your tongue for a few hours while they are around? If you feel so constipated, you should take your shit to where it belongs. 🤷

4. Oh no! She cannot do this, it’s too important a task to be given to her.

If I’m as educated as the man next to me and equally talented why should I not be handed over the important projects? “Oh because you won’t be able to handle it”

What a childish excuse is that? Why don’t you try her before judging her and being afraid of her “mote mote ansu” in case something goes wrong. What gives you the right to judge someone without giving them a chance. Not all women are like that one woman once upon a time who cried. (She may have had her own reasons for that but let’s discuss this some other day)

5.”Can you keep your cute infant’s voice to yourself? I’m trying to work here!”

Oh well, did you just come back from the lunch break where you ate the maa k hath ki roti sabji? Well, she’s a mother and nothing really means as much to her as her baby. You can politely ask her to keep it down or to move to a different place to finish the call. I’m sure you have no idea about how fast she wants to wrap it up because no one can wish to go home more than a mother of a 2 year old.(even the father in most cases.)

6. Women get more holidays and gifts than men.

For once and all, we didn’t ask for a women’s day or even a mother’s day. All we want is for the people around us to not think it is as easy for us as it seems.

I may get more leaves than you but you know what, try bleeding out through your pee-pee once every month and yes try carrying your own children for once, and oh, please try living with your in-laws. (They are not all bad, but everyone does have some expectations.)

We DON’T need your gifts, they’re useless most of the times. Just give us the respect we deserve.

People may put out millions of such rants but all I would say this for each of you sisters hustling in this man’s world You go girl! Do what you gotta do and let them be jealous. Let them say whatever they want, they don’t know what it’s like to walk in heels with a baby on one shoulder and a laptop bag on another.

I do recognize that there are some oddballs, I apologize on behalf of those fussy ones. They may have decided to not think about anyone other then themselves but not all of us are alike. (Applicable to both men and women)

In conclusion:

Starting a blog

This is new and I haven’t got a hold of it yet.

Having said that, let me tell you about the research and development I did for this. It seems that blogging nowadays is like writing, post renaissance. I had no idea what I wanted to write about so the first thing I did like any other lost person from 21st century is ‘Google It’.

Turns out that I am not the only one who has been having these issues, the very first article on the search results was titled “81 top ideas for starting a Blog that matters”. Now that is definitely getting my attention, or anyone else’s who is looking for one good start at this.

After this, very catchy title and before they started the list of the ideas (more titles), they had this small description of how a group of creative people wrote these and then there was a link for beginners like me which opened up a video “How to Blog” (and yes you have to pay for it.). Oh, but with me being broke and out of job, I went back to the article the moment I saw the ‘$‘ sign. Not that I’d have done it any different if I had the money.

The most interesting part about this article was that the ‘Most creative ideas’ were written in bold. It’s a great thing to do, if only any of those ideas meant anything to me. Here’s the titles and the respective reasons as to why I couldn’t write about any of these:

1. Rescued Animals

Questions:

A. Did I ever rescue an animal?

B. Do I know how to rescue an animal?

C. What animals can I rescue?

D. Where do I go to find this animal who needs to be rescued?

Conclusion: It’s a great topic but I don’t know where to start. So either I’d have to work on this first or let’s see what other ideas I can use.

2. Recipies for couples without children.

Isn’t that an odd title to even start with? They lost me at recepies, I was already reading the next title when I saw couples so I couldn’t even reach to the ‘ without children ‘ part. In short, I don’t know how to cook, I am nowhere near a relationship and of course I don’t have children, because that would be odd considering the relationship part.

3. Blogging about special kinds of food. (They’ve also got a course on this one.)

Well, food, now that is something I love but do I want to pay for a course on knowing special kinds of food?

Nah! Not really, I don’t discriminate between different kinds of food.

4. Hamburgers

Yes, that’s right. It says Ham-freakin’- Burgers. I may try this one some day.

5. Home brewing beer.

Oh la la… Something useful. Unfortunately they don’t have a course on this one and I can’t experiment this at home because of obvious reasons. (Shh… Maa ko nahi pata.)

6. Art of…. (Wait for it)… Getting what you want.

Wow!!! But sorry to disappoint you guys, no courses on this one either. If only I knew how to…

7. Learning the Ukulele.

I would first have to write a blog on ‘how to pronounce Ukulele’ . The desis may have some ideas on that one.

There are about half a dozen more of these most creative ones and then the other 69.(now that’s interesting, if only I had a bae.)

I still don’t know how to end these things so here’s a random picture.